50 Cute & Funny Dog Quotes
Looking for some cute & funny dog quotes to brighten up your day? Well look no further because Ive put together a list of my favorite funny dog quotes.
And if you’re looking for even more dog quotes don’t forget to check out our list of the 100 best dog quotes.
50 Cute & Funny Dog Quotes
“No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as much as the dog does.” -Christopher Morley
“Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul, chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we’re the greatest hunters on earth!” -Anne Tyler
“The best way to learn how to enjoy life is from a dog” – Nils Sandmann
“Without my dog my wallet would be full my house would be clean but my heart would be empty.” – Author Unknown
“If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge?” –Author Unknown
“I once decided not to date a guy because he wasn’t excited to meet my dog. I mean, this was like not wanting to meet my mother.” -Bonnie Schacter
“I feel sorry for people who don’t have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor.” – Author Unknown
“Handle every situation like a dog. If you can’t eat it or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.” –Author Unknown
“I don’t think twice about picking up my dog’s poop, but if another dog’s poop is next to it, I think, ‘Eww, dog poop!” -Jonah Goldberg
“What do dogs do on their day off? Can’t lie around – that’s their job!” -George Carlin
“If you want the best seat in the house, you’ll have to move the dog.” – Author Unknown
“There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.” – Ben Williams
“There is only one smartest dog in the world, and every boy has it” – Louis Sabin
“Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.” -Groucho Marx
“Dogs never bite me. Just humans.” -Marilyn Monroe
“In order to keep a true perspective of one’s importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.” –Derek Bruce
“Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.” -Ann Landers
“My cats inspire me daily. They inspire me to get a dog!” -Greg Curtis
“Dogs are like potato chips. You can’t have just one.” – Author Unknown
“The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.” – Andy Rooney
“You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, ‘Wow, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!’” -Dave Barry
“A dog can express more with his tail in minutes than his owner can express with his tongue in hours.” -Author Unknown
“To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.” –Aldous Huxley
“Dogs don’t lie around lazily, they decorate the room” – Author Unknown
“Some days you’re the dog; some days you’re the hydrant.” –Author Unknown
“I don’t feel at home without some dog hair” – Author Unknown
“Does he bite? No, he swallows everything whole!” – Author Unknown
“Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives.” -Sue Murphy
“A dog desires affection more than its dinner. Well – almost.” -Charlotte Gray
“Dogs teach us a very important lesson in life: The mail man is not to be trusted” -Sian Ford
“If your dog thinks you’re the greatest person in the world, don’t seek a second opinion.” – Jim Fiebig
“Dogs do speak, but only to those who know how to listen” – Author Unknown
“A dog does not know how to spell love, but he knows how to show it every day” – Author Unknown
“A well trained dog will make no attempt to share your lunch. He will just make you feel so guilty that you cannot enjoy it.” -Helen Thomson
“Dogs are great. Bad dogs, if you can really call them that, are perhaps the greatest of them all.” -John Grogan
“I’ve seen a look in dogs’ eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that dogs think humans are nuts.” -John Steinbeck
“Of course you can live without a dog, it’s just not worth it.” – Heinz Ruhmann
“It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.” –Jay London
“The best therapist has fur and four legs.” – Author Unknown
“The more people I meet, the more I love my dog.” – Author Unknown
“Reason number 106 why dogs are smarter than humans: once you leave the litter, you sever contact with your mothers.” -Jodi Picoult
“If you’re uncomfortable around my dog, I’m happy to lock you in the other room when you come over.” –Author Unknown
Please share with your friends 🙂
“A boy can learn a lot from a dog — obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down. ” – Robert Benchley
“You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.” – Harry Truman
“If you’re uncomfortable around my dog, I’m happy to lock you in the other room when you come over.” – Author Unknown
“Properly trained, a man can be a dog’s best friend.” – Corey Ford
“What I like most about people is their dogs.” – Author Unknown
“It’s tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won’t drink from my glass.” – Rodney Dangerfield
“If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.” – Fran Lebowitz
“When an 85 pound mammal licks your tears away, and then tries to sit on your lap, it’s hard to feel sad.” – Kristan Higgins
Please share with your friends 🙂
What Are Your Favorite Funny Dog Quotes?
Do you have a favorite funny quote about dogs? Did I miss any good ones? Let me know in the comments below.
More Funny Dog Quotes
Looking for some more great quotes about dogs? Be sure to check out the following:
- 28 Funny Dog Quotes – SpartaDog
- 52 Funny Dog Quotes – Good Morning Quote
- 100 of The Best Dog Quotes – Puppy Leaks
Haha, too cute! Thanks for sharing 🙂
Take care,
Henry
All of these are wonderful, but this one caught my attention…
“A dog desires affection more than its dinner. Well – almost.”
Lately, Haley’s been more into our morning lovefest of belly rubs rather than breakfast. But at dinnertime, forget it…food wins, haha!
Good
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I told my friend this quote today. Since she is having furbaby withdrawls. ” Don’t be sad. I will come over crawl in your lap, lick your face, dribble water all over the floor, and hide the dog toys in the couch. That way you won’t be so sad.
haha I really enjoyed all stuff, looking forward to more stuff here and also I have some adorable pics of dogs and puppies spread love and happiness
You know why a dog turns around 3 times before layidown…one good turn deserves another.
My golden shepherd dog loves it when I dress her up like Harry Potter. In this magical video, we discussed her love for
the movie.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mco3EHgZh8
Video is private
What an Amazing Quotes!
Thanks for sharing!
And it is true that a dog is smarter at some points, maybe not at some in all. The most important thing is to love and care for your pet. The quotes are actually funny and it’s vital.
I will come over crawl in your lap, lick your face, dribble water all over the floor, and hide the dog toys in the couch. That way you won’t be so sad.
Great collection of dog quotes. If only dogs could talk!
“Dogs teach us a very important lesson in life: The mail man is not to be trusted” – Really true!
Dogs understand our emotions better than we could ever understand their’s. They are boon to humanity.
As a dog breeder. These words helped me to be more motivated to care for dogs. Thank you for sharing. I am very impressed with these 30 statements.
It’s tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won’t drink from my glass. –
This one by Rodney Dangerfield is my favorite. 😉
I am also looking for some quotes and these are the best ones I feel from my research. Thanks!
Ah, dogs—the four-legged comedians of our hearts! They’re not just furry friends; they’re stand-up comedians with tails. From their ‘paw-some’ antics to their ‘bark-tactics’ charm, dogs have a way of making us laugh and melt our hearts. As Mark Twain wisely said, ‘If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.’ Well, that, and the fact that dogs never fail to bring a smile to our faces. So, here’s to the ones who make us laugh with their wiggly butts, floppy ears, and unconditional love. In the words of an anonymous dog lover, ‘My sunshine doesn’t come from the skies; it comes from the love in my dog’s eyes.’ Let the canine comedy show begin!”